Wednesday Why-I-Love-The-Weekly-World-News Blogging, Special Election Edition

Weekly World News is two-for-two on its NY candidate endorsements:

Weekly World News has always supported alternative candidates, including extraterrestrials, mutants, and dolphins. However, we believe that Hillary Clinton deserves reelection to the Senate over Nocturnal Party candidate Dracula.

Beyond the logistics of having a vampire in Congress -- he would miss every vote cast between dawn and sunset, and the intern mortality rate would rise --Dracula's mesmeric powers would make a mockery of the democratic process. While one could argue that this has already happened over the past seven years, there is a difference between bleeding people for oil and bleeding them period.

We also urge New York voters to go to the polls for former Housing and Urban Development Secretary Andrew Cuomo over his supernatural rival. While we believe that over a century in purgatory can change a man, we are not convinced that justice will best be served by Attorney General George A. Custer.

Well done, guys. Well done.